Abandon ties that bind, there's no salvation here.

Hello. My name is Daub. I am 30.9 years old, and I have been unemployed for almost an entire year. So unbeknown to you, you have all been paying my salary for the entire time. (suckers!) That does not make you assholes my boss! But if you could manage it, I would like Tuesdays off.

Currently, I live in the spare bedroom of one of my best friends and his old lady. There are two very ugly dogs here. They eat my shoes on a daily basis, somehow they are growing on me and that is lucky for them. For a more detailed biography please visit: www.washeduppornstars.com/dickdaubbone.

I do not have a problem with my drinking, but I do have a drinking problem.

Anyway, after a slight hiatus, I have decided to put fingers to buttons and share with you all some things that have been on my mind.

First of all, Robocop is an awesome movie. I remember when my mom took me to see it as a lad in the theater. It was odd, because my parents wouldn't even let me watch Ghostbusters. I don't think my mom expected it to be so graphic, and when the ED209 turned that businessdude into hamburger, I remember her dragging me out of the theater and keeping me outside until the barrage of gunfire silenced. I watched as much as I could before my exile, and after that my mom just gave up and let me watch the rest of the film.

I mention this heartwarming tale of my youth because I feel like that movie fucked me up for the rest of my life. I had never seen anything so fucking amazing in my life, something about the gratuitous violence, sex, and cyborg one liners changed who and what I would become. Kinda like how Linda Carter in that Wonder Woman outfit defined my "type" before my balls even dropped. Black hair, blue eyes, big tits, she ties you up and makes you tell the truth. I'm probably the only person who ever thought she was hot. Also she had an invisible jet.

What was I talking about? Fuck. I guess my point was that if Robocop were here, he and Wonder Woman would fix the economy somehow.

end transmission.